Guidelines for Listening

I wish I had learned this when I was much younger.  But even after writing this down, it is hard for me to be perfectly still and quiet when listening.  This list is from Vicki Degner at Church of the Open Door in Maple Grove, Minnesota.

1. Remain present.
2. Let me (or let you) cry.
3. You don't need to fix anybody.
4. It's okay to feel uncomfortable.
5. You don't need to rescue anybody (just be present).
6. Don't minimize the pain.
7. Silence is okay.
8. Let me (or let you) sit in this sadness.
9. Don't rob anybody of their pain.  What we can do is pray while we listen.

"Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.
For you, O Lord, have delivered my soul from death,
my eyes from tears,
my feet from stumbling,
that I may walk before the Lord
in the land of the living."  Psalm 116:7-9

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